Oops, I did it Caesarean

Future Trailer Park Denizens of America welcomed its newest member today:

Britney Spears gave birth to a man-child.

Teenyboppers and NASCAR fans everywhere rejoiced.

The pop singer (and I use the word "singer" in the accommodative sense) delivered her son, reportedly named Preston Michael Spears Federline, by Caesarean section. The Los Angeles Police Department, always conscientious guardians of the taxpayers' hard-earned simoleons, provided Brit the Twit with a police escort to the hospital.

From somewhere in the wilderness of Maine, my friend DL chimed in with this:

She's such a cheater by taking the Caesarean way out... Honey, childbirth is a simple comparison of spitting out a watermelon seed, except the seed's still inside the watermelon! I've had three children, all naturally; the last one without any drug intervention. Personally, the little drug intervention I did have with the first two children was like getting Novocain. The nurse said it would take the "edge" off the pain. In the words of Stevie Wonder, "You haven't done nothing!"

Spears and her husband, Kato Kaelin... I mean, Kevin Federline... can now compare baby photos with supermodel Heidi Klum and "Kiss from a Rose" crooner Seal, who welcomed a son, Henry Gunther Ademola Dashtu Samuel, to their family environs earlier this week.